Life After Cheating
Once you are confidently sure your mate has had sexual indiscretions outside of your marriage/relationship, there are some helpful tips to guide you through the initial phases of high emotions.
What do you do?
- Turn to God
- Acknowledge the harm that was done to you.
- Determine if you and your partner agree to recommit to one another monogamously.
- Seek help.
- Keep people out of your business that do not support your decision.
- Prepare yourself for turbulent trials (make a decision to rise above or ride it out)
Attitudes that interfere with healing and moving on:
- Bitter heart: How could you do this to me?
Humble heart: Hes not perfect, but God can perfect the love between us
- Destructive anger – Are you always trying to get even? Do you look for opportunities to lash out to protect your hurt emotions?
- Depleted energy – Have you lost the ability to try?
- Diminished happiness – Nothing is ever good enough. Do you have trouble smiling from the inside out?
- Deadened spirituality – Have you stopped listening to your Spirit?
- Distrust of others – Do you condemn all people who have engaged in the same type of issue?
The process of healing
- Accept what has happened
- Make a decision to work through the problems
- Be committed to change
- Be faithful unto God that you will be blessed
There is no right or wrong, however, there is a better way. That way starts with you. Unfortunately, there arent people that can tell you what to do when your mate has broken trust barriers. It is important that you set aside time to yourself and readjust your thinking. Allow your thoughts to align with your priorities and not your feelings. Your feelings are very real and of high importance, however, they can take you places that prevent you from seeing your situation clearly. Love is important, but so is your choice. When you make your decision allow yourself to adjust to the new accommodations that must take place. You can make it through.
For more nuggets of wisdom follow me on twitter @icanlady or Facebook.
Shannon Battle, Life Coach